Thursday, June 8, 2017

Medical referrals, Dr's offices and such - aka following rules is for chumps!

OK, so the "incident" from Monday ... The REST of the story....

I called and got an appointment with the Colorectal Center here in town

They first said I would have to have a referral from my primary care doctor... OK, so that would be Dr. X. Well, I haven't been to see Dr. X since 2014. Found that out when the Colorectal Center called back (should I just call them Buttheads?) and told me that I could NOT come see them because I needed that referral. Hum... why? Can't I just self-refer? Oh, yeah, you can do that... OK, I tell the primary doc's - let's do that, and I will STILL make an appointment to See Dr. X just because - well, to be honest, I didn't know it had been THAT long since I had seen him... but yeah, it's time. I'll come in, get the work up done.

I go to Dr. X and sign a paperwork release form to allow them to give my paperwork to the Buttheads. I make an appointment with the Buttheads for Wednesday. Ok? OK.

Tuesday I get a call from the Buttheads telling me they are cancelling my appointment with them BECAUSE I made an appointment with Dr. X. WTH???? I gave up the fight right then and there... I just said "fine"... click. I tell a few girlfriends at work here and tell them what is going on. One tells me to go to Dr. H - they have a nice office, etc, etc, etc. They are very nice. Hum... OK. I also took a page from her book also and ask "WHY" to Dr. X's office ... and tell them, really all I'm trying to do is get paperwork from Hospital to Buttheads at this point. Hum... so when I ask them "Why" they tell me "liability". The more I think about that - LIABILITY for WHAT??? For sending me to get a colonoscopy that I WILL need regardless of what your little paperwork trail tells you I need and what order I have to do it in so that every friggin' doc gets a piece of the insurance money?? So I ask them point blank "so I need to just GO to the hospital and get the paperwork sent to the Buttheads office then?" Yep. Little did she know that Buttheads are no longer EVER getting my insurance money after turning me away, thank you very much!

So as I'm talking to that office I'm already driving to Dr. H's office anyway. I walk in and let me tell you the dark clouds lifted!! Their office was very understanding. I told them exactly what happened... that I was in the ER, had this go on, nope, never had a colonoscopy done in the past... yep, over 50... yep, need one anyway, so let's get this show on the road. They make an appointment with me for the VERY next day!

So this morning I go in, get everything scheduled and meet Dr. H. He basically told me what he was going to do - basically - he's not going in looking for trouble as likely whatever trouble was there has resolved... and if it was something else, well, he'll find it on the regular colonoscopy anyway. Yep, I'm TOTALLY fine with that as I don't have any other symptoms... and even if I feel weird right now I question if it's just me being weird because I know I bled pretty good there for a day... so unless I'm bleeding anymore at all or really in pain like cramping pain... I'm going to consider any twinge as an "you're imagining that because you're concentrating on that end" twinge.... and I get my lovely colonoscopy on Tuesday.

NOW to add insult to injury, I also have bloodwork on Monday morning....yeah, fasting bloodwork. Yep, I see the wheels in your brain turning now...that means... you won't eat anything from midnight Sunday night through Tuesday sometime.... yeppers... But, hey, who is up at 8am eating a 4 course breakfast anyway? I'll just get a jump start on the "cleanse" efforts. Yeah me.... NOT.

So there you have it... I'm going to be a medical pin cushion for a while here.. also getting my 6ht month mammogram follow up tomorrow afternoon - I'm adding insult to injury on that one as I'm switching to the Pavilion as they have that new mammogram machine... then I review the orders and they are listed as ultrasounds on both side with mammogram if required... pretty sure with going to the new place I'll get the mammogram as well...but that's OK too as it has a lot more details and is 3d and "better" than the older ones. So - by now I have been scanned from almost top to bottom.

Monday, June 5, 2017

And it's official...

My butthole has fallen out before Butches.

What's that you say? TMI?

Well, read no further then 'cause it's on a get graphic!

I go to work this morning dreading the whole Monday routine...little did I know hat was in store. Sunday we had gone to he movies and enjoyed popcorn immensely. (Read into that tubs two tubs for three bodies)

I had a bit of a rumble in the tummy so made a quick walk to the potty thinking al that fiber was coming back to haunt me. Yep, it was. I sit down and glance down to bright RED BLOOD in my undies. Now folks, I have not seen this sight since 2007, so saying this was a shock puts things mildly. I did some "checking" and yep, not the vjayjay, the rectum. What the????? Nope, nope, nope this does NO HAPPEN! Stand up and enough blood is in the toilet I'm now officially in a panic.

So, I walk back into the office, tell my cube neighbor a cryptic "I gotta go, I may no b back" and off I go to the ER. Breathing the whole way repeating, "it's nothing, really, it's nothing". Telling my brain that NO, you may nit turn around and go back to work like nothing is wrong. I text my boss that I have a "bit of a medical concern", and that I was leaving nothing more. I call Butch, tell him the skinny in a message (yeah, he was getting ready for work, so hadn't answered).

And there I sat all day. I got an IV, EKG, chest x-ray, CT-scan and butt-swab (only thing they really did butt related)...however nothing conclusive, but also nothing they could see to cause them concern. Hum, Ok. Yeah, you guys say it happens all the time, but not to ME, thanks.

Also heard the code Blue in the CT room after I got back, and a lockdown situation. A man was brought in by his wife after another man shot him fun times at the ER eh? I should have left my door open 😜

So all that and I'm told to follow up with my primary care provider uhm, that I haven't been to in three years 😎 whoops! What can I say? I'm pretty darn healthy fir the most part. I self referred myself for my long overdue colonoscopy - ya think? I even tossed in my 50 year checkup....yeah, yeah, I know...I'm not 50 yet - heeheehee