Week 17 weight loss

Ok I still don’t see the difference here. I also wear fluffy clothing. :)I like fluffy clothing. :)


The front I can see some change in my arms :)


Hair loss is still adding up. Seems like I lose this much every time I shower. Good thing I’m not showering as often. The bonus of not going to work daily. And I notice my hair doesn’t get greasy as much. I can go nearly a week and it still looks great. No oil. There’s a silver lining eh!? And body odor. Weirdly there is little there anymore. Really. It’s weirdly good. I barely wear deodorant anymore. I sniff and nada. I did tell Butch to PLEASE let me know if my sniffer that is going ha!!


However not truly noticeable to the world. Still lots of hair left for the world to see.

So there is my weekly update. On other news neuropathy hand cold and fridge items. Freaky stuff. I grabbed the pickles out of the fridge and freaked out a bit. Burning cold. Scary! Had to hold parsnips with a towel to peel them even. Weird!! Nothing I can’t work around. Butch put gloves on the side of the fridge for me to use when I grab things from the fridge. I’m thinking this should pass in a few days like the mouth and swallow issues go.

Oh and hand cramps- Holy Mother!! My thumbs start pulling in and cramping and won’t let go!! I can stretch them but they continue to cramp. Now the silver lining in this is they only get cramps in the mornings. So there’s that.

What else? Nothing new. No diarrhea this go round. Not sure what they added but then may need to back it off a tad, too thick now. Sigh. Again. Nothing I can’t deal with.

The down side is weight gain. What the?? Back up to a 50lb loss not 55. I liked 55lbs down instead. Dang it! Not doing more calories but doing a bit more smart food. Need to go back to home made. Sigh. Working on it still.

I did get a dinner out as I had to dash the garbage out to the street in my jammie’s with bare feet and cold damp feet. But I made it just in time. Yay me! Boo Butch for forgetting. But hey I got a dinner out for my efforts :) I chose Johnnies pizza. For the calzone. It was worth the cold dash ;) the bread knots that made me want to go there were a disappointment, however the rest of the meal was great!!

Haven't done this in a while

I'm down 55lbs. Holding steady but still losing S. L. O. W.
But not gaining. Working in it counting calories and trying to behave.

Some days are better than others!!

Week 10

Warning gross stoma picture at the bottom!!!

So the sad reality is I don't wear slimming clothing.







As of today I am down 46.5 lbs. can you tell? Nope, me either.

The sad fact of the matter is I am not 100% in my diet either and I don't care.

I'm doing about 3 of 4 shakes and a meal. Not a HUGE meal or a super fatty meal but a meal. Last night with a baked sweet potato and about a 1/2 cup of chicken, broccoli and orzo pasta meal that Liz made. It was good. Did I have all four shakes? Nope. I don't even think I had four. I tossed my coffee 1/2 way through. I just could NOT do it. I had a biscuit with jelly. You would think I'm eating 1/2 a chicken with Butch's response. Honestly. Who the hell cares if I'm skinny!! Just him and the doctor and I think he cares more about it than the freaking doctor. Gimme a break!! Why not just love me for me??? Arge!!!

Yeah. Hitting another wall today. My stoma or rather the surrounding skin is PISSED. Not happy. Bleeding and miserable. 😭😭😭😭

And honest so am I.



Someone on my stoma group said it looks like a reaction to the flange. OK I changed that today. Going with coloplast plastic looking flange for a few days. Next change is next Tuesday with the home health care nurse.

OR I may wait it out to Wednesday for the wound nurse at Mayo to look at. Who knows. That may be a bit long considering how irritated that area is.

Poor pitiful me, hu?? 😭😳

Optifast week 9 and a few days

Ok back on the shakes. I'm down by 43 or 44 lbs. I weighed myself prior to my shower this morning. Then I thought of pictures and kind of chucked. So here you go!!



Ok it's sad that even with swelling from surgery I'm smaller than in the beginning. Or is that good? Who knows.



Here's the reality of what's under that dress 😜. Hopefully I'll get TWO of those bags removed today!!!!

I mostly weighed myself to know how the drain removal goes for me. I was told if I'm retaining more than I should my weight will give it away. So. We weighed.

I was surprised because I weighed 37lbs down when I went into surgery. I then weighed in 33lbs down while in recovery. So basically swelling worth 4 lbs. now I'm 43lbs down as of today. And that's with eating real food in the hospital. Not much, but I was eating real food.

Lately I'm having one real food meal a day (eggs or low fiber veggies) due to a screw up in not picking up my meal replacement shakes. Oh well. I kind of like having a bit of real food. 😄

Optifast week 7

Depending on when I weigh in, I have lost 37 or 38 pounds. Things have slowed way down from the beginning. I let the nutritionist know and she wasn't concerned so I won't be either. Done stressing over this part 😜

And as for photos. It's all in the angles.


So I noted I had my butt right at the glass edge so I moved forward and the angle was SO much more flattering 😄


And I don't feel one smidge different except I'm hungry all the time and tire a lot quicker.

IKEA on the way home from dropping Angela off was a challenge!! I "tried out" quite a few chairs and thought "hum, yeah come get me in a few" but I trudged on. I only bought $13 worth of stuff!! Shocking!!

Optifast week 6

Maybe the universe is trying to tell me to shut up about my negative feelings. My last post "poof" disappeared. Sigh

I just said I was mad. Mad at the world this week. Mad at my body and the fact that I'm NOT losing weight. I've not budged in two weeks. The worst I've find is a spoon of rice and turkey burger in cream of mushroom - a SMALL spoon mind you. Pinches of things. Just tiny smidges. Tastes of salsa. Really can't add up to more than 5 calories each. No worse than sugar free gum really and I barely chew that anymore because that tooth is NOT fixed. Another point of anger for me.

Everything is just ticking me off. I forgot to get my stupid urine test last week too. Dammit

I'm mad at the work paper trail issues. The frustration that abounds.

I'm tired of having to beg my children to pick up the friggin slack and clean the house they live in and TRASH. I'm just MAD.

Mad I keep getting woken up at the crack of dawn because someone can't stay on their half and kicks or pushes. WTF I can't sleep in anymore.

Just friggen mad!!!!!

So here's the disappointment






Yeah there is a difference from the start. But not much from last week. Sigh. I won't quit. I'll just be pissed for a bit

Optifast week 5 and 5 days. I Cracked!

Today I cracked (literally?) and ate my emergency meal in place of a shake. Two eggs and 1/2 cup O.j is allowed. I substituted salsa (same calories). 5 weeks 5 days. Good a friggen'nuf. Back at it for the last two shakes today and the next two weeks. I am so over shakes. Movin to Australia so I can have veggies 😂

Optifast week4

Unofficial weight loss is 24.5 lbs. let's call it 25, shall we?!
So the reason folks don't notice is this:


Jammie's and clothing are the SAME week. Week 4. Clothing adds bulk. Hum. Note to self need more slimming clothing but these are comfortable!!

You'll see a stark difference in these shots too as far as clothing not showing the losses





BUT we all know the truth. If I maintain current trend I should be about 50lbs down for surgery. That's good. Much less risk for me. That's a plus. Much easier for the doc to do what he needs. A plus for him.

This week has been a BITTER and ANGRY week for me. These yahoos on line who are spouting colon cancer is a lifestyle and that's the only reason you have it are in my last nerves. I have seen hundreds on line saying they were runners, athletes with GREAT eating habits and they have cancer. But these yahoos keep spouting "change this", "change that" and you won't have reoccurrence. Just makes me mad 😡. They are NOT researchers. They are not scientists if so then the world wouldn't have cancers in healthy individuals EVER. Grrrr. Oh well I walked away from that conversation in there.

That and I haven't pooped. Yeah enough to make anyone an angry person. Are you super happy to read about poop? I have pooped once (maybe twice) in the last almost two weeks. I am drinking over 64ozs of water a day. Sometimes I may be right at the limits but honestly I add more ice to my shakes than they say to, so I get more liquid there (and it's watering down the sweetness as well). So I don't think it's a lack of liquids. And I'm peeing a LOT so I'm well hydrated. More so than I've ever been in my life! But no poop.

I went to the pharmacist and laid it in the line. Gave him the diagnosis, the tumor Location and not wanting to do anything harsh, but needing some relief. He gave me stool softeners with a laxative and some probiotics. Ok.

I had a very loose passing with blood on day three of the softener/laxative but only after I took three instead of two the night prior and I paid for it with cramping and general discomfort for the day....and blood not a lot, but blood. Remember I haven't had blood in normal life situations since the 5th of June after popcorn. So this doesn't make me a happy woman.

So weigh in is actually when I'm full of poop too - ha. I'm so over this already and I have a YEAR or a while lifetime to deal with these poop issues. Ugh. What's a girl to do? "I just wanna go poop, I just wanna be normal again!" Said in her BEST Private Benjamin voice (if you're young, rent the movie!!)

And let's do talk about this diet. I'm OVER it. Tooooooomuch friggen sweets!! I know, I know, WHO says that? Hum a woman who has had nothing but strawberry, chocolate or vanilla ANYTHING in FOUR WEEKS!! Yes, I'm gonna yell at that one. I'm tired of sweet!!!

I have been horrible in the last week. I look at shake number 5 and think "oh hell no" and go to bed instead. Really. I just can't hang any more.

Tuesday is the day I see the nutritionist. I was going to cancel and ask to do the blood work and weigh in here but decided I need to TALK to her. I'm looking at can labels lately and thinking I can eat a whole can of green beans for 60 calories. A WHOLE CAN!! I know, I know nutritional value. Bah. I'm over it!! I can't become malnourished in four weeks I'm sure!!

So. That's where I am. I think this qualifies as the "emergency" that they told me to eat the eggs. But even then I look at the Orange Juice they want me to consume with that. Uh, no!! The calories in that would give me FOUR tablespoons of pico instead. Suck it lady!! Tomatoes are fruits, right??

Day 21 - Optifast.

OK. I'm now at week three.
Well, not until tomorrow morning. But this is a full 21 days on liquid diet.

Is it working? You betcha. Can I tell? You betcha. Can others? Nawh, there are no comments from anyone at work.

2 weeks weight loss: 13lbs (their scale)
3 weeks weight loss: 7.5lbs (my scale)

Yes, that total is 20.5lbs

And this week I'm STARVING!! What the hell!??? I don't do bad in the morning, but at night? Horrible!! Today I had 7am, 11am, 3pm, 5pm, 7pm, 9pm and starving at 9:30. Sigh. Not giving in JUST yet. Not truly emergency mode just yet... adding a Fresca. Maybe that will help then just go to BED!!

Anyway. Here is the results.


Ok I can NOT see the difference from the front. No way, no how...just don't see it unless it's my BOOBS shrinking. I mean come on! Not the boobs!! Honestly bras are fitting a little different, so sadly they may be shrinking 🙁 boooo - hahaha - kidding. Who cares.

The NEXT is where I have to admit the difference.


Yeah there is a difference. I am NOT sucking in. Nope. Not at all. Just standing there all relaxed

May have to go to the gym to exercise the arms there. While I still can (for a while)

So there you have it.

Oh and I read my lab results on my tumors. It was a little scary with thoughts of a DNA something or other. There is a bit more to have them look at as far as the heredity factor of what's going on in there.

I went back and looked at the initial paperwork.
3 polyps removed
1 polyp ablated
1 cancer tumor identified
Next colonoscopy
1 polyp removed
1 biggie identified
Next colonoscopy
Identified biggie removed
1 MORE polyp removed

Yeah. The total is 8. EIGHT. One of the 8 is really a tumor. 1 precancerous. Yeah, something is going on in there pathology report says:

Interpretation: The results of the IHC analysis suggest the presence of normal DNA mismatch repair function within the tumor. Thus, the likelihood that this individual has an inherited colon cancer syndrome due to defective DNA mismatch repair (HNPCC/Lynch syndrome) is reduced but not eliminated.

These results reduce but do not completely rule out the possibility of defective DNA mismatch repair within the tumor because approximately 5% of cases with defective mismatch repair do not show absence of protein expression by IHC. These results also do not exclude the possibility that this individual's tumor is due to an inherited defect in another gene not involved in DNA mismatch repair. A significant fraction of clinically defined HNPCC cases (30% or more) do not have defective DNA mismatch repair as the underlying genetic basis of their disease.

Additionally, we cannot rule out the possibility that this individual or family has HNPCC/Lynch syndrome because this tumor could represent a sporadic occurrence. If there is a strong personal or family history of HNPCC/Lynch syndrome-related cancers for this individual or if this individual has multiple tumors, consider microsatellite instability (MSI) testing on this tumor or a different tumor to further evaluate the possible role of defective DNA mismatch repair for this individual or family.

CAUTIONS: Test results should be interpreted in context of clinical findings, family history, and other laboratory data. A genetic consultation may be of benefit.

So... how's THAT for messed up? Sigh. So. We I assume they are doing the MIS testing they indicated and we will seek out the genetic consultation and see what this means for MY girls!! I guess we won't borrow trouble until we hear more, bug we will investigate for sure!!

"What's ten pounds off a whale?"

Ok Ok before y'all get mad I really do not think I'm a whale. Big gal, yes. Whale? No. BUT I had to steal the saying off my Aunt Tuny. It's perfect. 10 pounds sounds like. Lot but not when you need t lose considerably more.


So when they put me on my forced diet thought I would take before and during pictures. So the first 10lbs are off. 2 BMI points.

I should apologize for the Jammie's, but I won't. It is what it is.
Before - day 1





And after - day 14
I even wore the same Jammie's so there is a true comparison. To me, there is no difference.





Ok maybe the side view is a little slimmer, but not much.

And the diet continues.
I have to say I look happier in day 1 - hahaha. Hangry woman!