I'm not losing like I was with Optifast BUT I'm reporting every week and I probably shouldn't. If I weigh every day I'm surprised how my weight fluctuates - up to three pounds at a time. I went to the cancer clinic and it was three pounds more than what I weighed at home the day prior.
So. I'm close to 50 lbs down still....the right downward trend.
I'm tracking my food on My Fitness Pal and thinking of getting the premium to show better suggestions on what I need to add to be more healthy and balanced.
But here it is as if today:
That big bump is the lovely hernia and the bag. Fingers are resting around the hernia. Sigh. This will get fixed in 4 or so months.
Three months of chemo and one month healing time then surgery to reverse. So thinking if it's like my first surgery it would be a 6 week wait or so to get in.
And so I march on!
Chemo. I had my education on Friday (15th) they told me pretty much told me what I know already about from my groups and having three months to research and talk with folks. Nothing shocking.
Well I take that back they said I would START chemo the very next day. Yeah, you read that right. I will start chemo on the 20th bright and early. Ummmmm. Ok. AND they said when I get my port put in I should tell them to leave the needle in.
Uhm say what??? Yeah, leave the needle in that they will be using to flush the line the first time. Why you ask (cause I know I did)?? Well, I will be sore and stiff and they said rather the poking me again I should have them leave it in and avoid the stick. Smart move!! Ok need to remember that.
And so the journey will begin.
While I'm here gotta say a few things. I am not gonna sugar coating things here. I had the nurse ask me Friday when I explained I was still supposed to be on the Optifast diet and have very liquid output at most time. She asked me why (not the first nurse to ask this). What on earth do you want me to say? I've gotten to the point of saying "because I'm fat". I mean duh. You can see that. Sigh.
Also someone said "oh it must be nice to be back to normal". Hum. Yeah. I'm so far from normal. I always say "I'm fine" which all things considered, I AM fine.
I could be worse. But normal? Uh, nope. I poop myself daily even though I have a stoma. I have a poop bag in the front but what they (docs) don't tell you is some folks have mucus pass through the nether region as well.
As it is I'm lucky in that my colon work super well. But I'm unlucky that my colon works super well and I'm the mucus queen. To the point of "pooping" myself. I wear a pad daily and see diapers in my future. No really. I'm going to have to retrain my bowels. If I'm lucky it will go quickly and things will solidify and I'll get control easily. Either way there will be pads in my future for some time as I have Read that accidents WILL happen.. for a while.
So when I say "fine" it's just that I know you don't wanna know. Not really. It's gonna be a long road back and I may never get there and, that's OK too. Not ideal, but it's fine. I'll deal with it. I may whine, but hopefully I'll just laugh about it and move on. The reality is I'm shopping diapers at Sams and happy to announce they have what i will need if things don't go as well as I hope ;)
But yeah, I'm fine.
1 comment:
Yeah, I wondered how that nether area was doing. The surgery site is SO CLOSE to the end of things. Good to know the colon is still doing it's job. I think regular food will make some difference, but not all. The colon's job is to absorb water, right? That should be nice after you're all put back together. Man, I sure hope Chemo is bearable. Sounds nasty. You'll have to tell me how the energy level feels once you're on it. Hang in there, Donna-poo. And 50 pounds!! Woo Hoo! That should make Audrey happier, perhaps.
Post a Comment